


Kind lies and unwanted mercy

by orphan_account



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Abusive John Winchester, Angst, Anxiety, Dean Winchester Raises Sam Winchester, F/M, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, John Winchester's A+ Parenting, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Pre-Series Dean Winchester, Pre-Series Sam Winchester, Protective Dean Winchester, Romance, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-29
Updated: 2018-06-29
Packaged: 2019-05-30 11:02:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,618
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15095357
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Pre-series Wee!chesters arrive!! Ofc pov.14 year old Ren isn't great at life. Her dad is a dick and she always has this pit inside of her, it gobbles up every good thing and turns it into something negative.A month before her 15th birthday, she meets Dean Winchester (and his Impala) and immediately takes a liking to him (but mostly his car).Romance happens but there is a few bumps along the way. The world isn't what it was before she met him, is it better or is it worse? She can't decide.Or: JUST PLEASE READ ME!(Summary may be changed as fic develops)





	Kind lies and unwanted mercy

**Author's Note:**

> Ok. I just really enjoyed writing this so I'm sorry to all the readers waiting for me to update my other list of fics.

Sometimes I want to scream and shout, break things in anger, but I don't, because I know that nothing can help with the deep pit of darkness that had decided to take up residence in my chest against my will.

Whenever I try to fight the painful darkness, the world collapses around me. Or maybe I'm the one that collapses to the ground of this big, cruel world?

I live in a world stained with gruesome truths and kind lies, but I also live in a world with soft smiles and unwanted mercy. I can never decide whether I love this scribble of a painting called life, or hate it from the depths of my very soul.

My life had punched me in the gut too many times to count, but I still felt the lingering warmth of love pricking at my skin whenever I saw my mum, or my brother and my baby brother. I think they're the only reasons that I'm still here, breathing, talking, living.

I smile, I laugh, and I crack cringy puns and I don't seem broken from the outside. Not to my family or my friends, or to the lady at the shop six blocks over, I never have, and I never will display my face without my mask.

\--

I got ready for school and ate my cereal as fast as I could without waking anybody in the house up. My shoulder length, curly hair was a pain in the ass to brush without groaning in agony, therefore running the risk of raising the dead(AKA: family), so I just tied it up in a stumpy ponytail and grabbed my bag before running out of the house. I loved my family but seeing them makes it harder to force myself into the realm of teenagers and useless teachers. But most of all, it was still early, so dad would be at home still. I did not need an extra bruise today, it was hard enough worming my way out of gym class with ye ole' period trick, (luckily my gym class teacher is a man- they don't question it.) I don't need a black eye to explain to the nurse.

When I got to school my two best friends, Alice and Aisha were giggling and chatting away with each other. 

"Now my pirates, you don't seem to be scrubbing the deck, like your Captain ordered!" I shouted whilst running at them and squeezing them until they couldn't breathe. The empty pit in my chest expanded.

"We are sorry Cap! We were just getting to it!" They forced out in unison. Because our names made an: ' A(lice) A(isha) R(ren)' or ARRRRR! Like a pirate; ever since Bradly from next door told us it just sorta stuck.

"Why are you here so early?" Aisha asked once I let her go.

"I set my alarm wrong." I shrugged, the pit ripped slightly at my easy lie. No matter how much the hole grew it never got too big for my chest.

"Well, whatever, now that we're all here why don't we gossip about the new boy- or should I say, man." Alice wiggled her eyebrows at us both. She was the sort of girl that set everyone up, that's why everyone sucked up to her, cause if they get their slimy hands on a double-decker to give to her, they scored themselves a setup with their crush.

Aisha scoffed at Alice's remark. "We all know you have terrible taste in men." A smirk crept up her thin, dusty rose, lips.

"Very funny." Alice deadpanned. "Well, at least I have great taste in women." 

I watched as Aisha groaned. "Please don't ever talk about your relationship with my sister ever again." She wailed as she brought her hands over her hijab to cover her ears.

Other kids had started to turn up but the pair didn't stop their argument. 

Sometimes I can never keep up with those two.

Suddenly, a sweet black Chevy turned up at the side of the road, it made such a perfect noise and had such a smooth finish that I didn't even notice the halt in the expansion of the pit.

Out of the car- no, the masterpiece of God, came a reasonably tall boy wearing a worn leather jacket.

Without thinking, I began striding towards him as quick as I could. He leaned into the car's window and, most likely said his goodbyes -not that I cared, I was too busy drooling over his car to register what the hot, new boy was doing- to whoever drove him.

When the car drove away I finally made it to the boy's side. "Wow..." I said, not knowing what else to say.

The boy looked down at me slightly and smirked. "What? You like what you see?" He asked teasingly.

We stood at the side of the road, me staring at him in confusion until I eventually realised what he meant. "Oh, no! I meant the Impala!. Not that I don't like what I see, I mean you're really hot n' all but..." I stopped when I felt the familiar heat along my cheeks and neck, along with the familiar stomping around in my stomach. 'Why did I have to say all of that!?'

If it was possible, the boy's smirk grew even bigger than before. "Well aren't you a cute one?" My eyes widened at the tease. "And if it weren't me you were admiring then who was it? Please don't say, my dad."

'Wow, this guy was cocky. But sort of endearing- NO REN! No crashes for you! Especially not on this guy, although, he did have an awesome ride- AGAIN, NO. Too many things could go wrong.' I thought to myself.

And there was the unpleasant expansion of the pit again.

I then realised that I had to answer him, not just stare at him through hooded eyes, whilst everyone that walked past us stared (probably at him more than me).

"No...I was actually just admiring your dads choice in rides. 67 Chevy's are my wet dream." 

The boy's vibrant, moss green eyes sparkled as he laughed. With that, the brutal stomping around my stomach quieted down.

"So you like cars?" He asked.

I breathed in, getting ready to rant when I caught the time on my cheesy football watch (not mine, mine probably got mixed up with my brothers when I hurriedly left the house).

"What's up?" The boy asked whilst waving a hand in front of my face.

"Oh. Nothing, it's just nearly time to get to class." 

I looked him in the eyes and asked for his name.

"Dean, Dean Winchester." He chuckled. "And you my lady?" 

"Ren. Ren Patent." I copied his voice. It was so weird how comfortable I was with him already.

"Ok, see you around then Perv." He said to my face, not once letting his smile trickle from the corners of his lips.

"Hey!" I gasped dramatically. "What was that for?!"

"For talking about your wet dreams with a stranger on the side of the pavement." He threw me one last smirk before jogging off to the double doors of the school.

I stood there for a minute, trying to register what just happened. Damn. I could feel the crush forming. Or was that the candyfloss pink blush running up my face, neck and ears?

Without me noticing, the pit had shrunk to a small ball, not even expanding slightly. What kind of witch was he!?

The only thing I could hope for now was that Alice and Aisha saw none of that what-so-ever.

\--

I was eating lunch at the top of a tree with Alice and Aisha, when we all looked down to see one Dean Winchester calling me (Perv) from the bottom of the tree.

When he knew that he had caught my attention, he shouted up. "Hey! Come with me, I wanna show you something."

Alice and Aisha immediately recognised the nickname and looked my way, giggling and pushing me down the tree slightly. I knew I would regret telling them about my encounter with him and his Chevy. I didn't want to spill the beans, but they had already seen half of it.

"Why?" I asked, obviously suspicious of the taller boy. I found it so weird that I could talk to him like I had known him forever.

"Its a surprise, just come with me, quickly, lunch ends soon!"

"Come on Ren. For us?" Aisha pleaded with her chocolate puppy-dog eyes that reminded me of my baby brother.

"Ok! Fine!" I groaned as I packed up my lunch and climbed down the tall tree, saying my goodbyes to my sniggering friends.

"Please don't take me somewhere secluded and then brutally murder me." I couldn't help but sigh as I walked past him, waiting for him to catch up and lead the way.

"Dark humour, ok, I can deal with that." He mumbled, not just to himself.

He caught up to me and smirked. "No, I won't kill you, but depending on your reaction you could well self-destruct." 

"Where the Hell are you taking me?" 

He sighed and wrapped his hand around mine, "You'll see." and dragged me along.

I was too busy trying not to think about how he held my hand that I didn't notice us walking out of the school grounds.

We walked through alleys and across roads until Dean came to an abrupt halt. He turned to look at me, still not letting my hand go. "So you like cars right?" 

"Oh god. You didn't steal anything right?" I asked, legitimately concerned for my already vaguely extensive criminal record.

"No." He huffed. Then he turned around and climbed over the wooden fence in front of us.

"So breaking and entering instead." I muttered to myself as the condensed pit of darkness finally grew a bit.

Dean peered over the fence from the other side, either he had grown two feet in two seconds, or he was standing on something on the other side. "Come on Perv, we haven't got all day." 

'If dad ever finds out about this, I'm pinning the blame on Dean Winchester. He deserves the beating more than me.'

I shook my head at him, good-naturedly, whilst he bared a toothy grin. Then, I ran straight at him and quickly jumped the fence. He jerked away from it as I landed right where he was standing a few seconds ago.

He scoffed with that trademark smirk of his, whilst I try to catch my breath and get over the fact that: yes, I just did that.

"So?" Dean asked.

"'So?' what?" He sighed, cupped my rapidly heating face and turned me to gaze at the small scrap yard, filled with skeletons of vintage cars and motorcycles. I couldn't stop myself from drooling a bit.

"You are weird." Dean said once he let go of my face to stare at the same view. "But its awesome isn't it?"

"Yeah..." I breathed. So many beautiful vehicles in one small, weedy space.

Dean sat on the relatively intact hood of a 1976 Catver, and patted the space next to him.

I shook myself out of my trance and sat down next to him. We were unnecessarily close. The pit was inactive. I wasn't thinking about my dad. And it was so quiet.

I smiled at him with all of the warmth I had left in my broken soul. He would never know how much this means to me.

"You were right. I might have self-destructed of you weren't here." I laughed, trying to hide the second meaning of the phrase. At lunch, I had suddenly started feeling really bad without any reason whatsoever do it was lucky that Dean had bought me somewhere so amazing.

"Well it's good that I'm here then." Dean said, turning his gaze from the scrap yard to my eyes.

"You've got really beautiful eyes." He muttered, leaning closer to me, subtly, but noticeably ('wow, he's giving me a chance to turn away isn't he!?') I just held my gaze.

I felt the scorching blush on my cheeks, the whistle of the breeze passing through the skeletons of the cars, the irregular breath of Dean Winchester just inches from my own lips.

And then they touched. It was a weird feeling, one I assumed that I would never feel, but dreamed about anyway.

I could feel the tip of his nose on my cheek and mine on his. The slight banana taste on his lips, suggesting what he had eaten for lunch. The sound of shuffling, as Dean moved somehow closer to me. The swirl of colours behind my eyelids as I tried to imagine how Dean was feeling.

And then cold air hit my somewhat damp lips. I hadn't realised till then that I couldn't breathe. I took a deep breath as Dean did the same, all the while never breaking away from gazing into each other's eyes.

"S-sorry..." Dean whispered, looking down at his lap. His face was as rosy pink as mine.

My mind was still full of cotton and a splash of glitter here and there, so I couldn't comprehend why he was sorry.

"Why are you apologising?" I asked with a bit more hurt in my voice then I intended.

He laughed a little. "I don't know." He didn't know that I heard him mumble, "force of habit." Under his breath.

'God, he's so cute...'

The silence was overwhelming. The dark pit doubled in size, 'I guess he's a double-edged sword then,' I thought. 'He can make it disappear in one cocky smirk, but he could also do the opposite with an awkward silence.'

"Thank you," I said as quickly as I could, "for bringing me here."

Dean smiled softly. "No problem, I found it when I was running from my brother last night." 

I couldn't help but think of how he could be running from his brother for the same reasons that I want to run from my father, however, that idea and (I will reluctantly admit) hope was soon smothered as he continued.

"We argued about our dad, but he got really angry, I couldn't handle the fact that all of his points were true." His voice turned to all but a whisper towards the end of his sentence.

After some debate with myself, I slowly leaned my head on his shoulder. Every few minutes I had to remind myself that I had only known this fifteen-year-old 'bad boy' for a few hours.

He huffed quietly as my head hit his shoulder, we stared into the scrap yard and forgot about the world. The pain. The love. The hate. Everything. It was just me and him. Nothing else.

\--

"We should get going." I whispered.

"Yeah." Was all he said.

We didn't move as we watched the sky turn a salmon pink. We had been sitting there for so long that my legs were numb. I knew that if I went home then that dad wouldn't be very happy, but if I just didn't I could put off the beating for at least an evening.

Dean took a deep breath and slid off the hood of the car. "Tell me where you live, I'll walk you home and explain to your parents that it was me that made you ditch school." I could feel the moment when he re-made his mask and plastered it back on to his face. That was also the moment that I realised that my own mask had somehow slipped off. I didn't know if I should have been terrified of him or let the warmth I had for him grow.

"Thanks." I said, sliding off of the hood to stand next to him. I knew that it was a stupid idea, but for some reason, I couldn't pass up the chance to have the strange new boy that I gave my first kiss too -and he to me, judging by his reaction- walk me back to the place that me angry father lays in wait. I expected the pit to pulse at the idea, but it stayed still and quaint.

"Well then, better get going." He smirked and took my hand, dragging me across the scrap yard and to the fence.

"You gonna show me your ninja skills like last time?" 

I laughed. "Ooooh noooo." I donned a smirk of my own. "That was a one-time thing. Your gonna have to pay to see that again." 

Dean let out a cross between a huff and a snigger. "Ok then. How should I pay you?" He tapped his chin in mock thought. "$10?" 

I copied his action and pretended to think. "Ummm...Nope." I shook my head at him.

"Then... What if I do your homework for a week?" 

"Tempting but, no."

"I won't tell your friends about what happened? I saw them chasing you." He said with a real shit-eating smirk. This guy sure does that a lot.

"Now that's just blackmail!" I giggled, squeezing his hand.

"Ok then, how about a date?" He said immediately as if it was his goal this entire time. He looked me in the eyes and I could tell that he was fighting the pink around his ears that was threatening to overtake his whole face.

I stared up at him slightly, noting how green his eyes really were. My face now matched the colour of the sky. 

"I- I suppose I wouldn't m-mind that." His eyes widened as if he had expected me to refuse. A huge grin engulfed his face whilst butterflies charged around in my stomach.

"Saturday morning? Meet me here at 9:00?" He almost exclaimed, squeezingy hand so tight that it sort of hurt. 'How is he so strong!?'

I looked down to the floor. "Yeah sounds good to me, meet you then." It was already Thursday so I only had two days to wait, but, weirdly, it felt too far away.

The silence wasn't awkward, because both of us were grinning to ourselves and already planning every minute of the date.

"Great! Now let's get you home!" Dean exclaimed, let go of my hand and jumped the fence. "Come on Perv!" He called from the other side.

"Please just call me Ren!" I giggled after getting to the other side. His hand laced together with mine again and we began walking.

"Nope. Your name is Perv and that's it." He smiled.

At this point my mouth was beginning to hurt from all of the (real! I repeat, not even slightly forced!) grinning, though I didn't stop.

"Well, then I'll call you... Chevy. Cause I don't actually like you, I'm just trying to score a ride in that sweet, sweet Impala of yours." I teased, bumping his shoulder with mine.

He put his hand to his chest in mock hurt. "Yout words wound me so!" 

We talked and joked in the sunset. Finally, I pointed out my house on the semi-fancy estate.

"So, I guess I'll see you tomorrow at school." I said with a soft smile as I turned to face him.

"Yeah..." Only the crickets could be heard along the dusky street.

"Well...then...bye?" I stuttered awkwardly, glancing up at him.

He didn't say anything, just looked at me as if I was the only person in the universe who could save him. I suppose that I had a similar look.

His gaze dropped to my lips and mine to his. Slowly we moved closer. I could feel his breath on me again. I tip-toed partially. The silence was defining, I could only hear his breath. The memory of his lips on mine ghosted around my yearning lips for a moment, before they touched once again.

I leaned closer and he did the same. Slowly I wrapped my arms around his neck as he snaked around my waist. Occasionally I could feel his tongue touch my lips, the sensation sent butterflies free to roam every part of my body.

"Excuse me?" Sneered a gruff familiar voice, coming from right behind me. We quickly broke off and I turned to stare at my father, standing there with his arms crossed and fire in his eyes.

I could hear Dean trying to control his rapid breathing as he watched the tall man in front of us.

"Hi dad..." The pit in my stomach expanded and flipped at the same time, making me feel as if I was going to be sick.

My own breath betrayed me as it hitched every few breaths.

"Umm...hi Mr Patent." Dean said nervously. I couldn' t take pleasure in the fact that he remembered my second name, for my dad had suddenly grabbed at my arm. I tried not to flinch or squeak, but reflex was a bitch. There was no doubt that Dean noticed.

"Come inside. Now." Dad breathed out. "And you," he snarled, pointing a finger at Dean. "I never want to see you here again. Do you understand me?" 

Dean immediately straightened his spine and nodded with a "yes sir." He too seemed to act on pure reflex, because as soon as he did so, a clear look of regret took control of his face.

Wheather he wanted to or not, he didn't get a chance to correct himself, dad dragged me to the open door of our house and all I could do was look at him, pleading, 'please, please! Save me!' But he just stood there, I knew that he couldn't do anything and so did he. For the first time ever, the dark pit felt too big for my body.

\--

**Author's Note:**

> Yep, believe it or not this WILL be a relatively slow burn. 
> 
> Please comment. My life force is running out and only comments can rejuvenate my cold, dead soul.
> 
> Ps: There is no such thing as a 1976 Catver. I know nothing of cars so I decided to make one up.


End file.
